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Road Folklore Jun 24 - The Joint...Clemson, SC The first gig with a new record in hand: Dirty Little Secrets! Now for the road trips, etc. Day 1: Spy told Mascot to stay home and tend to his (Spy's) "business empire", so we had no roadie, and no driver. Kobie and Rob road with Chip because Rob couldn't leave until after noon. I drove the van to South Carolina while Spy took pills, slept, snored his ass off, took more pills, smoked, and smoked some more in between his naps. I listened to bad music on the radio and it sucked. Great ride down!!! Kobie and Rob showed up litteraly 2 minutes before we played at 11pm. Cool club/college town. The other band was cool - Barney's Jive Band - go see 'em. Jagermeister came into play (shockingly) and then we drove all night to the outer banks. Moral of the story: don't think that beacuse the states border each other that the gigs are close by. drive time to Ocracoke: NC 12 hours + 2.5 hour ferry. (Spy slept on the boat too.) Jun 25 - Smacknally's ....Ocracoke, NC It rained. It was an outdoor gig on an island. Do the math. If you ever get that far out/down on the outer banks though, stop by Smacknally's - cool people, and great food. I think most locals on this island hate Papashake though because we quit doing part time gigs in a cover band they used to love. Oh well - how many times do you need to hear Janis Joplin? - steal your mom's vinyl. Spy was asleep for 37 hours. Moral of this day: This island needs some kind of an age restriction, and on any given day, on an island in the outer banks, there could be a hurricane and you could be killed. Jun 26 - Kilroy's...Springfield, VA Leaving the island, Spy was actually awake for 3.2 miles and was driving the band van. During that 3.2 miles, we were almost washed out to sea, while spinning off the road in ocean water that had come over the dunes during the night's storm. He managed to recover for an instant, taking the van back the other direction and into oncoming traffic. The U-haul was jack-knifing so hard that you could see it's back door next to the van's front passenger window. Kobie and I were scared. Kobie was grabbing the dash so hard that his nail marks are visible to this day. I was in the back, floating weightlessly above the bed, defying laws of gravity. As I stared death in the face, I could remember being 4 years old and telling my mom that I wanted to be an astronaut when I grew up...what a disappointment this end was to be. Somehow, by the grace of Jah, we didn't hit anything. Naturally, Spy said he had enough at that point, and went back to sleep. We eventually made it to Springfield, VA after a stop at the H.J. (Hooters Junior - tiny one...used to be a Roy Rogers) in Chesepeake, VA. Papashake headlined a benefit concert for kids with cancer called Rocks 4 Locks. It was a really nice event/cause, and we hope to do it again. Moral of the story: going 95 miles an hour through seawater on a highway that is routinely beneath the surface of the Atlantic Ocean could cause death, dismemberment or low birth weight. July 1 - Lion's Den - New York, NY Nothing quite like being late for a gig...we hadn't practiced in a while and everyone was getting sick of the tunes (that seems to happen when you go into the studio and play the stuff over and over and hear it over and over). Spy could never make it to write new songs (reasons: Maryland is too far away, and drugs are more fun), so Rob and Kobie and I sat around pissed off most evenings since about early June. (Spy finished his drum tracks in May, so except for the gigs, no one saw him ever.) On this day, everyone showed up ready to roll to NYC, but we had to wait for a delivery of pills for Spy - the guy shows up with a zip lock bag of xanx, Spy eats about 12 of them, smokes a cigarette, gets in the van, and immediately goes to sleep...it was funny for a few months, but when you have a new record, and the music is suffering - well it may be time to move on. Good gig - odd bill though (some Allman Bros band was playing as well - strange). Quote of the night: "That was pretty good, but we should practice more often...I feel rusty on the drums." and then the drummer naturally rolled right into the van for more sleep. The rest of the band, Mascot, and Rockesh (another roadie that night) all hit the town, got really fucked up. Then I got ripped off from one of the street vendors. Water = $2. I gave him a twenty, and he naturally gave me $3 back saying it was a five. (I may have believed him, except that Kobie gave me the money, and right before Kobie said "All I have is a 20, bring me change.") We tried to have Rob talk to him in Spanish, so then when that didn't work, I got fired up and threw the guy into his stand. The cops came, and made him count his money (for what I still don't know - like that guy keeps an acurate drawer with his sales...come on!?!?) Next some local neighborhod jackass tried to fight me because I had a "Kiss of Death" shirt on so he assumed that I was a "tough guy" (in his words) beating up his friendly neighborhood street vendor. The cops came again. It was silly. To finish off the night, Rockesh and Mascot ran the final toll on the turnpike from NJ into Delaware beacuse they didn't feel like slowing down/paying. The next day I found out about the toll running while in the Outer Banks, NC because the NJ Turnpike ticket was still in my van, and not turned in at the final toll with payment as required by law. Nice. Lessons learned: 1) If your drummer is asleep all the time, and not practicing ever, then he like drugs better than you. 2)Street vendors suck 3)Most cops are cops because they were picked on when they were little and they are not smart enough to do much else - "time to payback the world, 'eh there coppers" 4)Roadies should never be left in charge of a decision to pay or not to pay a toll if the rest of the band is crashed out. Make sure someone else is awake too if they are driving at 5AM Jul 20 - Three-1-Three...Belleville, M0 Missouri is far away from Washington, DC. If you do not leave the day before, you can not get to the show in time, so we planned on leaving DC at 11pm on July 19th. Problem is that if everyone is sitting at the band house in the driveway waiting to leave, but you have no drummer ready to leave, then you have no drummer in Missouri, and the show will not go off as planned. For days we had been trying to get a hold of Spy, but he wouldn't return calls. Finally the day before, he called up and said that he was coming on the road (after some persuading - he originally lied and said that his girlfriend was going to leave him if he went or some shit like that. Funny thing was - she had already left him a few months before...drugs - nice lie.) We called Spy a number of times as 11pm drew near, but got no answer. We began to worry again. He had his people (read: friends) call us and lie for him, saying that he in rehab (see above: pills, crack, etc), and that he was not going to make it. Call me nuts, but nice timing. I was furious. The tour is planned, the promotion (radio, magazines, etc) is done, the expenses have been incurred...sorry, but rehab doesn't cut it...he could've gone when we got back (and quit the band too for all I cared at that point). Kobie and I called bullshit, and decided to drive to VA to Spy's house to check out the "gone to rehab story" Sure enough, Spy and his people were lying. He was sitting at his house enjoying drugs more than music. Kobie and I had a heated argument with him, and told him that he was coming with us...he refused. (At that point, what is the difference between not doing drugs in rehab, or if you don't do drugs with us? We weren't going to let him smoke crack with us in the van! - he had a committment. What a dick thing to do.) He made a choice, so we closed the chapter of Papashake with Spy in it. Kobie, Rob and I went to a bar and plotted our next move. (We cancelled the gig in Belleville.) We put out ads on the internet detailing our needs and our intinerary that night and began calling people first thing in the morning. We called everyone in the industry. We tried to borrow other band's drummer, we begged, we offered cash... Amazingly, we had a number of responses in a short time. I drove to Baltimore, I drove to DC, I drove to Gaithersburg to meet drummers and interviewed a number of guys that next day. The basic criteria for getting the job was this: "can you leave DC tomorrow for five days", and "can you learn the songs on the way to Cleveland without a rehersal?". After a good meeting at Hooters in Rockville, we settled on Chris Murry. Chris was a local guy that had been playing in a number of bands in the DC area and was also a sound man. Everything seemed as good as it was going to get, so we agreed to meet at 10AM the next morning and head off to Cleveland. What an exhausting, stress-filled 24hours... July 21 - Hi-Fi Club...Cleveland, OH So as we pulled out of teh driveway, who knew what to expect. Was Chris going to be great? was Chris going to suck? Were we about to get booed out of Cleveland? Worst of all, I knew that all night, we were going to be turning around, looking at the drum riser, giving cues to changes whether things were going well or not. We stopped at Staples, bought some batteries for Chris' CD player, got him some headphones, and said, "listen over and over and over to the Papashake CD...don't talk to us for six hours, and we will see you on stage in Cleveland." Chris layed on the bed in the back of the van and did his homework. We drank beer in the front of the van and prayed. (Sidebar: Our a/c in the van broke in Fredrick, MD about 30 minutes north of DC and we had to suck heat the entire rest of the way...praying now that we had a good gig, and the club had a/c.) We got to the Hi-Fi and found about five other bands on the bill..they were all pretty cool and we made fast friends with the other musicians, etc. Naturally, the club had no a/c, but they did have $1 Pabst Blue Ribbon! When Papashake was ready to roll, the tension was a bit thick... Chris blew the first fill on the first song, but other than that, the rest of his mistakes were pretty cosmetic. We had a decent show, sold some CDs, got a bunch of people into Papashake, so it was a success all in all. Smiles all around on the way to Chicago. July 22 - Uncommon Grd...Chicago, IL Possibly one of the coolest shows on the tour - literally. Air conditioning, in a heat wave, in a small room, playing an evening acoutsic show, with good beer = a good time. Not to mention - Chicago is a great town, and if you get the chance to visit the strip next to Wrigley, I recommend doing just that. Lots of beautiful people and cool clubs. If you happen to take a cab to one of the after-hours bars, make sure that you do not leave your wallet in the back seat when trying to pay the fare. If you do, then that = no after-hours club, no ID, no $ and Steve Montrose then will be paying for everything over the next two days. July 23 - GS Festival...Salem, MO Look out!!!! HEAT WAVE ALERT! For some reason, us guys in DC don't think of Missouri as being hot - especially not in the middle of the Ozark Moutains - but boy were we wrong. After many hours in the van (from Chicago) with no a/c, it is always refreshing to jump out into a 102 degree day with thick humitity. We have been to Vegas, we have been to the desert, we have been to Florida, but holy shit was it hot this day. By 12 noon we were concerned that we would not be able to play... ...naturally - the best cure to all the heat issues are these: go watch some of the other 50+ bands on the bill early in the day with the sun beating down, play basketball, and drink as much Pabst Blue Ribbon (event sponsor) as possible. By showtime, Portillo had low-birth weight, Kobie didn't want to operate heavy machinery, and I (JW) was either pregnant, smoking or something else that the surgeon general warns against. 8:45PM Showtime - shoot us!!! It is too hot!!!! Holding picks and sticks was impossible. Playing was impossible. Every song was a challenge, but somehow we pulled it off. As I looked across the stage (one of the biggest we have played - easily 25/30 yards wide) at Portillo, I think I saw God - while Rob is a great guitarist, I don't mean he is God - I am talking about the actual God (supreme being) - he whispered "Hey jackasses in Papashake...it is over 100 degrees and you are jumping around like idiots up here. That does it, I am taking away your 'Earth life cards', you are coming we me." After the show, I was kinda hoping that God would make good on his promise, but instead, evil Satan came through in the 9th inning and smacked a home run right past Team God. He said "All sweaty, nasty members of Papashake and their crew, please report to the van with no a/c for a 22 hour ride back to the East Coast - you have one more show on this trip!!!" We signed a few t-shirts and CDs and off we went. July 24 - South River Cafe...Annapolis, MD So we left Missouri at 10:30PM and we pull into Annapolis at 6PM - do the math - that ride SUCKED. We looked like complete shit as we pulled into the club's parking lot. Showtime was 6pm and amazingly we made it. Papashake had a host of friends waiting for us to arrive back in town, but when they saw us, I think they were afraid. No one had changed or showered from the night before, so we were looking pretty rough. The show must go on as they say, so we changed shirts and hit the stage for the final show - and showhow we had a pretty good gig. It was good enough that the radio station & Coors Light who sponsored the show invited us to their next show in town. We drank a few beers, and all passed out - what a journey...and with a new record out, we knew there was more touring and mayham to come.